Dolo – you have a new normal and your normal isn’t like “normal-normal” but that doesn’t mean it won’t work for you. You simply need to start building a life around yourself and what you can do. In the end it doesn’t matter what anyone else thinks or believes, you know what’s going on in your life.
I don’t have ataxia as a nuerological condition, I have had chronic, neuroligically complicated migraines that were officially diagnoised at 18 (I’m 48) now. Some of the side effects during a migraine include ataxia and some of the daily meds I take have caused mild ataxia in general. As an example, all of my dishes are Corelle (shatter proof) and all of my drinking glasses are plastic. Why? Because I drop everything. I had to ruin a full set of nice place settings by dropped them or misjudging where the shelf was before I gave it up and bought things that work with what’s actually happening in my life.
My big goal as a teen was to graduate from high school and go to England, to live and work illegally basically, try to get into university over there and so on and so forth. I had been there on an art history junket in high school and wanted to go back more than anything. By the time I graduated I was on daily migraine meds and having 10-15 migraine days a month. There was no way I could go without access to immediate doctor care or medication so no European advernture for me. No living out of a backpack for a year and all that. So be it.
There’s an old saying that you have to play the hand you’re dealt. This is where you are right now, you’ve been dealt a less than ideal hand and now you have to play the game so you win on your terms.
It can be done! Don’t worry about what others think or feel or say about you and your condition. In fact, if you have friends who make you feel badly maybe it’s time to get rid of those friends. Harsh sounding, I know, but a true friend doesn’t make you feel badly. A true friend says “What do you need from me? How can I help you?” Those are the people you want in your life.
You can do this. You simply have to do everything you can to stop comparing yourself to others, stop concerning yourself with expectations of others, work on yourself, for yourself.